Infj intj dating
T he INTJ INFJ combination is one that looks good on paper mainly because of the shared intuition preference, specifically that of dominant introverted intuition. This he believed was because it allowed for better communication and understanding between one another. Here is a look at 6 aspects of this pairing that might explain the INTJ INFJ attraction and why these types can go well together in both friendship and dating. They can be a formidable team who works in concert to accomplish a singular goal that they can agree upon. Both types take some time to warm up to someone before they can begin to slip into their comfort zone but that is because they want to test and feel out another person before they let down their guards. INFJs by comparison may have more difficulty leaving an unhealthy or unsatisfying relationship since they have the tendency to hold out for the idea that they can fix it or improve themselves or the other person over time.
The Surprising Thing About Dating an INTJ, as an INFJ
That changed when I started dating an INFJ —someone who is like me in so, so many ways, yet as different as the sun and the moon in others. As a result, this pairing is a common one as common as any pairing can be for such rare personality types. Together, we get to let our quirky sides out and indulge our flights of fancy—without giving up our generally organized lives. All of the above may sound made in heaven, but every couple has their differences. INTJs, on the other hand, enjoy discussing the merits of the idea itself, in abstract terms, and treat the personal impact as a footnote.
This can come off as deeply insulting, without the INTJ realizing why. INTJs take note: Meanwhile, INFJs tend to put out a lot of reassuring, supportive words to those they love, and these words can seem insincere or meaningless to an INTJ—who would much rather get results than a pat on the head. We live almost entirely in the future. An INFJ learns early in life to trust his or her gut feeling about someone they meet, while an INTJ views hunches with suspicion often to their detriment.
Instead, her attention is on the conversation, music, or something else enjoyable. In almost everything in life, she will choose comfort or ease of convenience over pure efficiency, and I will choose the opposite. But no couple is perfect, and fights happen. In general, whether a disagreement turns into a fight depends on which mental processes the couple uses to address it. Here are the complete car models of both types:. The result: This could be for several reasons:.
And they are both incompetent at these roles. The INTJ will start to rant about the unfairness of the situation. They may construct elaborate metaphors or hypotheticals trying to make their feelings understood. They could try to turn the tables and argue that they are the victim in the situation, even if they were actually the one who caused the initial slight.
They will cast blame on their partner. The INFJ will start to demand answers to impossible questions: Why did you say this and not that? They may revisit the timeline of who said what and who said it first. They can dig into a vast repository of past slights, quoting something their partner said years ago as proof that the partner is lying or wrong. It involves physically separating. Instead, they have to go over it again and again in their own heads, alone. This is the ideal circumstance for their dominant Perspectives function to take over.
The effective thing to do is to compromise. Instead, you have to agree in advance to use this process the next time you fight, and then someone has to invoke it when the time comes. Are you in a relationship with one right now? What do you feel pulls you two together—and what are the biggest stumbling blocks? Hello, i really like your thoughtful and thorough infomartion. Have you ever encountered a LDR? He felt like home. On the section about fighting, we rarely fight, but we normally do go in to co-pilot, but on the rare times a silly disagreement or misunderstanding turns in to a fight or the other person is insulted and one or both of are under duress, our 10 year old selves come out.
We learned in our first year of marriage, space and time fixes these fights. Highly effective. Do you have any children? I have a child from a previous marriage who is most likely an INTP and is 7 years old. Everything in this article is so true. We rarely fight read: I do most of the masterminding and she helps show me how to realistically apply those ideas.
Her perspective often keeps me in check. I love my best friend! Then you might not be an INFJ. Our personalities are built on intuitive work. Not necessarily. It depends on the situation. My boyfriend is the INFJ. I can say this article really accurately describes some of the more intimate workings of our relationship. We are celebrating our 2nd anniversary in just over a month and have never fought. We handle disagreements with radical honesty and compromise.
I had a good laugh at the part about being together in silence on devices and the INTJ ranting about an article. I found the part about disagreements to be incredibly enlightening. I once explained to my boyfriend how I shut down when someone raises their voice at me during an argument. I warned him if we were to fight not to yell at me, as it would be counterproductive to finding a solution.
I suppose that motivation for the conversation makes me a typical INTJ. I, of course, pushed back. A fight is coming sooner or later, better to be prepared to work on our communication than blindly continue forward as though rough times never happen. He more or less compromised with me by returning my comment with a nod of acknowledgment. Relationship is awesome.
Relationship life is like a tunnel, long and much to explore. But after resolving the fight it feels more closeness. It feels we are connecting more at a deeper level. Love and every aspect of life is so amazing. Infj-intj couple is the best as far as I knew. I have never felt so complete and content in my life with anyone else before. So I encourage you to undergo any conflict or misunderstanding and resolve them.
You will be amazed to experience mature love in a deeper level. Been together 4 years, 2. A revelation lol. It still is, but obvs we have been growing a lot lately as Fe and Te clash. Ive met a bunch -my mom in law, 2 bosses, my sister in laws ex boyfriend- geez, superficially for a few hours great time, for whole day not my cup of tea and vice versa haha. My INTJ actually gets me and we have that telepathic mutual understanding and connection Ni and it feels unparalleled from anybody I know, any other type.
Te actually is tribe reasons, while Fe is tribe feelings. Im also looking forwad to our 30s and 40s where Im supposed to grow my Ti and he his Fi-wooot! I hope no huge stressirs hit us like they did in our first 2 years married too omgosh. Stress changes people into their shadow personality but unhealthy way, and it becomes difficult to not be out of character or more or less emotional than one is.
Hes the world to me and i to him since we met and hasnt changed but intensified in richer and new heights and ways. I talked to others, but we became inseparable since. My intj was on same page since we first talked. He even gave me a promise ring 3 months after first talking, and even tho that sounds crazy, we both felt we just knew each other from childhood or from forever, like we had always been together. We really slowly gradually fell in love those 3 months, doing long distance!!
A year later we got engaged. A year later married. He his Te and Fi, likewise. Ti sucks when hes doing Fi, I become cold and analytical whicb he doesnt need or appreciate. This is when i need to use Fe and kicking in my compassion and respect, and he using Te and not Fi to be able to see and act based on reason that I need him to and not whether somethign feels good to him tertiary Fi. Such rich information and sentiments here! This article was great, and I love reading the shared stories in the comments.
Ahhhhh, the feeling of being understood. So comforting! It helps me to appreciate how precious it is to give anohter the gift of feeling understood. Thanks so much for this article! The fights section is dead on. We were both amazed at the accuracy of our little co-pilot tendencies. Excellent insights all around!
The Surprising Thing About Dating an INTJ, as an INFJ. Ladies and gentleman, isn't love divine? More so, when a bunch of psychologists. Here is a look at 6 aspects that might explain the INTJ-INFJ attraction and why these types can go well together in both friendship and dating.
When we do find that special person, we can still be an enigma. So what should you know about being in a relationship with an INTJ? This is part of our wiring.
INTJ's are not known for placing a lot of emphasis on romance. We embody the suppression of emotion, not the expression of it.
Then there is almost always a statement about how any two personality types can make a relationship work if they try hard enough. Of course, this sentiment is true. INFJs can have happy relationships with any personality type.
INFJ-INTJ: The Dark Horse of Ideal INFJ Relationships
As soon as I was able to use it to explain my weirdness, I wanted the rest of my family to type themselves, including my husband. Of course these are generalizations, something personality theory as a whole is subject to. I think it was this that got my attention when I met my husband: I had never met someone so much like me, but with more confidence. He was in a previous relationship with someone who enjoyed socializing regularly, and he describes this as a source of constant struggle between them.
5 Personality Types That Are Highly Compatible with INFJs
They have the greatest capacity for love and empathy within a relationship but their tendency to be extremely gullible and idealistic can create problems. INFJs prefer long, lasting relationships and avoid short-term relationships if they can. They sometimes forget to take care of themselves. INFJs have a habit of taking care of everyone else around them before they take care of themselves. INFJs just need a bit of time to recharge and refocus. They always have in the back of their mind your favorite activities, places to go, and preferences when making plans. Someone who puts a lot of emphasis on labels, designers, or money is immediately off putting. Even if they recognize a relationship is failing they have a hard time detaching themselves from their significant other. They want to believe in their partner so much, often at the risk of sacrificing their own happiness and comfort.
Catching Elephant is a theme by Andy Taylor. Misadventures with INTJs.
When they delve deep into meaningful conversations about theories, experiences, and ideas, the two types can talk for hours. We connect the dots by listening to what is being said, but we also listen to what is not being said.
6 Reasons Why INTJs and INFJs Make Great Friends
More so, when a bunch of psychologists endorse your relationship based on your personalities? Ooh lala. Common traits of an INFJ include being asked the questions below and freaking out. All these questions are met with a big fat. All my friendships are based on one on one interactions. I crave emotional intimacy. We like to feel like we are connected to people. We enjoy deep conversations and expressing our thoughts and feelings. We cannot settle for anything vacuous or superficial — if it is not deep and intense, it is truly not satisfying to us. This is one of the biggest issues for INFJs in relationships. As people pleasers, relationships are a way for us to showcase how much we love the other person and have a uniquely intense emotional relationship. What better way to get instant INFJ satisfaction than in a monogamous relationship right?
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This pairing is extremely rare, simply because these two types combined only compose 3. If they are lucky enough to meet each other, they tend to have an instant spark because of their shared dominant function: Introverted Intuition. In some ways, these two are kindred spirits. They observe things in much the same way and enjoy similar topics of conversation. This article will explore some of the amazing strengths of this relationship, and some of the pitfalls that are common in this relationship. This means that they both focus on intangible connections, abstract relationships, and connections between the unconscious and the environment.
INFJ female dating INTJ male
That changed when I started dating an INFJ —someone who is like me in so, so many ways, yet as different as the sun and the moon in others. As a result, this pairing is a common one as common as any pairing can be for such rare personality types. Together, we get to let our quirky sides out and indulge our flights of fancy—without giving up our generally organized lives. All of the above may sound made in heaven, but every couple has their differences. INTJs, on the other hand, enjoy discussing the merits of the idea itself, in abstract terms, and treat the personal impact as a footnote. This can come off as deeply insulting, without the INTJ realizing why. INTJs take note:
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.INFJ and INTJ